I was going through my blog looking for some pictures from when I was in Brazil last time and stumbled across this post:
"Being in Brazil is always a pleasure! It reminds me of things I have almost forgotten throughout the years living away from here. I miss the simplicity of life and the energy of my people...how caring and loving they are and always ready to help no matter what. I miss the extreme happiness and laughs and friendship, the kind of friendship that fills your heart with warmth and love..that kind that seems like you know that person for years...even though you have just met. I miss having my family around...seeing them when I first wake up in the morning and sharing our problems, frustrations, accomplishments and laughs together...I miss seeing my parents growing older, my sisters turning into such beautiful ladies and fighting for what they believe in, spending time with my grandmothers and uncles, and aunts and cousins...sharing a little of their lives with them. Our beautiful beaches, lagoons and rivers...and the untouched green we still preserve. There is so much beauty in this place...it makes me proud to say I am "Alagoana"( person who is from the state of Alagoas).
Of course there are also bad things...the poverty is something I can't close my eyes for, the amount of kids in the streets begging for some money or food, and young teenagers who are pregnant and starving walking on our streets mostly victims of sexual violence, the roberies, the POLITICIANS... but you know what, it's all REALITY... reality that is part of every country in this world, but that most wont show. We have it all... from the poorest to the richest. The diference is...we are happy people,all of us, no matter what. We always find that little something to smile about even when things couldn't be worse... and that's what I miss most about being in Brazil.
But at the same time I think about the life I have with my husband who I love sooooooo much and my son (and soon new baby)away for here. I love every minute of it. I have to thank God for showing me the way to John. Love you bebe!!
I learned throughout these years that I can live without all those things I mentined above for a year( they are part of me and will always be, I never forget where I come from)...even though I love them so much. What I couldn't do is stay away from my huby for too long(I am here for 2 weeks and can barely stand the distance already)... wouldn't be able to miss his laugh, angry face(hehe), his sweetness when dealing with our Ethan, all the complaints( :) ), how unbelievebly inteligent and caring he is, how much he loves me and our babies...yah I can say for sure...he is THE MOST important thing life has ever given me (together with our babies...of course!).
Don't know why I decided to write all this...was just here thinking about things and started to write them. So here it is a bit of my thoughts for you...
Also wanted to say we are having a great time here and both Ethan and the new baby are doing very well, this week I will be fiding out the sex of the new addition and will let you all know. But for now that's all!
Much love,
Amanda"
I was telling John, I know when it's time to go home when I get this empty feeling on my chest whenever I think about my family. And I am getting there! I can't really stand the fact my dad and nanda haven't been able to meet my little girl yet. I look at her and all I think is "gosh, dad would love to meet you little one". She is already getting so big! I know I probably won't be able to go any time soon so I am trying to at least keep all the records that I can. Pushing myself to getting her scrapbook organized and up to date so when I go they can feel like they didn't miss much. My dad said to me he likes the photos I take of the kids coz even though he isn't here, the photos are so cristal clear it makes him feel like he can almost touch them. It made me choke! Most of you know about my strong relationship with my dad. How important he is in my life. I miss him like I can't even tell you. We are best buddies. I love when I go home and get to hang out with him. We enjoy the simplicity of things... like a crab getting sand of his "house", or watching a hummingbird drinking sugarwater from a cup he set up on our yard. It's funny...most people would call those things "boring" but they are probably the things I enjoy the most. Anyways... Belinha fell asleep. I better get her to bed.
beijos, me. :)
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